The Deal Breaker

         I used to think she was cute until I saw her drive. She was racing up the hill. She didn't even bother to slow down at the stop sign. She was driving like a lunatic. What an idiot! She and I can never date now, I concluded. I was on my way to my favorite taco stand when I came across her. Sheesh, what's the hurry?
         A short time later I found myself on the main boulevard looking for curbside parking. There was a car blocking traffic. Somebody was trying to parallel park, but couldn't get it right. The car kept pulling out into the boulevard, readjusting, and trying to back in again. I wheeled around it and found a place to park. I got out of my car and was about ready to place my order, when I noticed the car still trying to park. There was a new group of cars trapped behind it as it moved forward and back with failed attempt after failed attempt.
         I placed my order and sat down and waited. I noticed the car had finally squeezed into the parking spot. A young, long legged Latina get out of the car. She placed her order and stood off to the side. I was staring at the ground. When I looked up I caught the Latina giving me the eye, the once over. I snuck a peek at her at her when she wasn't looking. She was as beautiful as a field of wild flowers at sunset, but knowing that she couldn't parallel park ruined it for me. We can never date, I reasoned. It would never work.
         

Don't Get Your Mind Made Up

        I went to open mic to play a new song that I wrote. It's probably the best song I've ever written in my entire life. I was looking forward to playing it. I sat at the bar, sipped a beer, and waited my turn. 
        The bartender walked up to me, "are you going to play something new tonight?'
        "Yep," I beamed.

        I finally had a turn at the mic. I plugged my guitar in and broke into the song. I noticed right off that nobody was listening. In fact, people were talking very loudly. I couldn't believe it. I played the song the best I could, all the while thinking, wow this sucks. When I finished the song, the crowd's response was lackluster. 
        I stepped back and gathered myself for my second song. I decided to play a tune I'd written a couple of years earlier. I was going to can it at one point and remove it from my repertoire entirely thinking it was too soft and gushy. But I thought I'd give it one more chance before I did that.

        I broke into the tune and right off I noticed a change in the audience's demeanor. At one point near the end of the song the room fell silent. They were actually paying attention. When I finished playing I walked back to the bar and sat down to finish my beer. The bartender walked up to me. He was moving real slow. He had a coy look on his face. He put his hand to his jaw and rubbed it as if to think. He looked me in the eyes and leaned in. "Did you write that second song?"